Every person lives for happiness and values, but not every person’s view of the world is the same. Let’s think of your view of the world as a pair of sunglasses. If the lenses of your glasses are blue, you see blue, if they are yellow, you see yellow, and if they are black, you see everything around you. In other words, the glasses you wear are actually your perspective, your schemas that make up your personality. Schemas are actually intellectual/emotional structures that your mind develops to achieve what you need. Like being loved, like being accepted. And each person’s point of view is different. So if you look at the world with yellow glasses and see yellow, it does not mean that everyone will see yellow.
Therefore, it is not right for you to react to other people’s problems as if you would be so upset about it. To give a simple example, when two people are having a panic attack, one of them does not reach that level, while the other has the belief that ‘I can experience a medical disaster at any moment’. A person who carries this belief at a level that is ingrained in his personality becomes very sensitive to signals coming from his body and often has anxiety problems. To give another example, let’s say that two people take the same exam and both get the same low grade. One of them got a very bad grade, I’m very unsuccessful, all the negativities find me. I got it, but that doesn’t mean I’ll always fail. I will prepare better for the next exam and get a much better grade. Here we can see that both people interpret failure from different angles. While negative thoughts create anxiety in the person, these concerns actually give us signals about events, and we want to escape and extinguish these anxiety-causing thoughts and situations. We take every thought very seriously and if this thought is a negative and judgmental thought, we act as the thought tells us and increase our anxiety. Sometimes it is necessary not to touch the thoughts, not to interfere. It is necessary to calmly watch the thoughts from afar. It’s nothing but getting stuck.