Since sexuality is still considered a taboo in our society, it remains a difficult topic to talk about. For this reason, individuals either remain reluctant to express any sexual problem they experience or try to solve and gain information in unhealthy ways. In addition, it can be said that there has been a certain increase in the number of people trying to get support in the process that progresses in proportion to the education.
Especially in rural areas, it is seen that there are serious problems in terms of reaching the right information in connection with the level of education. Therefore, the most frequently asked What is the Vaginismus Problem? What is the Cause of Vaginismus? Vaginismus Symptoms? Vaginismus Exercises ‘I will try to give information about such things.
Although vaginismus is defined as the involuntary contraction of the muscles in the vaginal region during the first sexual intercourse in women, the absence of entry and the inability to achieve intercourse, it is also defined as the reaction that women are affected psychologically and that they show excessively anxiously to protect themselves completely during sexual intercourse or during gynecological examination. Women with vaginismus experience involuntary, repetitive or continuous contractions in the muscles of the outer third of their vagina when they know that they will have sexual intercourse or that there will be an intervention in their vagina during a similar gynecological examination, and their legs are closed with this contraction. The anxiety they experience becomes so intense that they may pacify their partners by exhibiting pushing behavior with this anxiety, or it may become difficult to perform a gynecological examination.
When the Problem Starts and How It Develops
In fact, the problem of vaginismus is always present from the first moment of sexual life in almost most of the cases, but the fact that women who have this problem have almost never experienced sexual intercourse prevents them from realizing the existence of the problem. Avoidance of sexual intercourse before marriage is often exhibited unconsciously. The reason for avoidance is at first for moral or religious reasons, but even after the marriage has taken place, the sexual intercourse experience is constantly delayed for reasons such as headache or fatigue. After extreme fear, anxiety, and convulsions occur as a result of the first attempt, the couple begins to be less eager to try again, and as a result, sexual intercourse attempts begin to become quite infrequent within a few months. In the end, couples generally develop a sexual life habit that is unique to them, but sexual intercourse is not in question in this developing new sexual habit.
When we look at the childhood or teenage years of women with vaginismus problems, we see that they are generally described as “the good girls of the family” by their families. Apart from this, it is seen that there are women who do not go beyond the boundaries drawn for them, obey the rules, do not reflect their anger and anger outwardly, and at the same time need to be accepted by their family and social circles.
Vaginismus occurs as a defensive response. For this reason, women with vaginismus develop unconscious defenses and see men as threatening as well as aggressive, and therefore refuse intercourse. In addition to all these, the perception of sexuality as “dirty” and “bad” causes resistance to sexual intercourse in the following processes.
Since the violence in the mind related to sexuality, occupation and perception of sexuality as dirty and bad bring the need for self-defense and taking precautions for the woman who has vaginismus, the meaning of the contractions in the woman actually consists of the effort to take precautions for all these things we have mentioned.
Do Women Experiencing Vaginismus Have Sexual Desire?
In cases where sexual intercourse will occur in women with vaginismus, the contraction is very strong, it is as if a wall of flesh and bone has been built. However, in most cases, it is observed that women who have this problem do not experience sexual desire, sexual arousal or experiencing orgasm as long as vaginal entry is not forced. However, when it comes to sexual intercourse, even this thought or even a small attempt can cause women with vaginismus to contract and panic.
Characteristics of Women with Vaginismus
It may sound interesting, but women with vaginismus problems and even their spouses have common features that are similar to each other.
- They are generally inexperienced in male-female relations,
- They exhibit childlike behavior
- They don’t want to be an adult woman
- They may have phobic, i.e. vaccinated anxiety and discomfort.
- There is a particular avoidance of sexual matters.
- They are prone to sexual arousal and orgasm
Characteristics of Vaginismus Spouses
- They are generally kind, gentle and understanding people.
- They are also known as “respectful” individuals by their environment.
- Passive, often not sociable
- They do not have enough sexual experience.
- They may be worried or even afraid of harming their partner.
Psychosocial Causes of Vaginismus
Research shows us that in vaginismus cases, the psychosocial reasons for the development of the problem are as follows and women who have this problem face some or most of the following situations;
- The father or the person who is the father figure in the family is excessively authoritarian and oppressive (In such cases, the woman chooses to marry or be together with someone who is almost the opposite of her father.)
- It is observed that the mother figure is weak and powerless, unlike the father.
- Problems and difficulties are observed in the parent-child relationship between father and daughter.
- The family’s attitude and view towards sexuality is that sexuality is worthless and humiliating.
- Inability to touch and dislike the genitals with the feeling of disgust against the genitals
- Negative conditioning about sexuality in religious matters
- Exposure to or witnessing sexual violence
- Fears that the hymen will be damaged or the hymen will be lost
- Fear of becoming pregnant or thoughts that it will be a terrible experience
- False beliefs about sexuality (Sexual myths)
- gay identification
- cultural reasons
Attitudes of Spouses to Each Other as a result of Vaginismus Problem
With this problem, the spouses experience some anxieties and develop some attitudes towards each other in the process. For example, in couples with this problem; begins to experience some contradictions within himself. Part of him says he needs help, while part of him is extremely afraid of being treated. At the same time, while experiencing disappointment, this disappointment is accompanied by a feeling of inadequacy, and on the other hand, he experiences the fear of abandonment.
In couples with this problem, if it is male; He thinks that he is not wanted by his wife at first, but after a while he accepts the existence of the problem and starts to become passive.
As a result of the process, the couple gradually exhibits avoidance behaviors, putting an end to all their physical activities and intimacy efforts.