Humans are the only living species that have difficulties in surviving on their own and need a close relationship with them. The close relationships that a person establishes, sometimes a neighbor relationship, sometimes a work friendship, a kinship relationship, and sometimes the romantic relationships that almost every individual needs most…
Romantic relationships, individuals; intimacy, attachment, mutual exchange of feelings; It meets many needs such as investing in someone emotionally, establishing a relationship of trust, respect, passion, love, and contact. While individuals are generally in search of the romantic relationships they need, they may have set many criteria or be in expectation. These expectations and criteria can be good from time to time, and often harmful to individuals in a relationship. In other words, there are difficulties in starting a romantic relationship for individuals as well as maintaining it. So, what should couples pay attention to in order to maintain a healthy romantic relationship?
WHAT SHOULD COUPLES DO TO MAKE A HAPPY RELATIONSHIP?
First of all, couples should pay attention to being us, not me, in their relationships. Of course, couples should have individual living spaces and they should be able to make individual decisions, but the need to be me in the relationship should be balanced in a way that does not harm being ‘We’, and it should not be increased to a level that makes the couples forget their togetherness.
Couples should be able to identify their individual sources of happiness and unhappiness, and after these are shared among the couples, they should clarify the situations in which they are happy and unhappy as a couple, that is, as ‘We’.
Another issue that couples hinder or forget in their relationships, especially after a certain period of time, is meeting their desire to be appreciated, to be pleased with each other, and to be liked. Couples should take care to use a communication language that mutually appreciates each other and shows that they are satisfied with certain behaviors and thoughts.
Couples should take care not to be insensitive to what each other likes and cares about. They should be able to be curious about each other’s issues by sharing, especially on important issues that affect each other, and they should be able to discuss the issue for their partner, because they are ‘We’.
Couples should take care to behave while maintaining love and respect in their communication with each other and their behavior towards each other. Every behavior to be exhibited and every word that will come out of the mouth should be evaluated by the couples whether they will harm the love and respect between them.
Couples should be able to make each other feel that the other party is valuable, special and unique for them. It is generally believed that the way to make one feel unique is through gifts, especially by women. Yes, it has a very important place in your gifts, but the important thing is that what you do has a meaning for your partner and makes you feel that your feelings are reciprocated. For some, a sudden touch, for others a few words may be enough to make the individual feel special in a relationship.
One of the most common causes of conflict in relationships is the unnoticed disruptions in communication. In other words, the reason for conflicts may lie in the fact that correct and healthy communication is not known by the couples. Couples should pay attention to whether they establish a correct and healthy communication that expresses their understanding of each other.
Couples should be careful to keep the language they use in their communication with each other free from non-constructive criticism, judgments, and labeling language.
Couples should be able to find their common pleasures, create common living spaces where they can spend time with pleasure, and take care to turn them into rituals. While trying to make all these rituals, couples should also be open to spontaneity.
Generally, couples, individuals who are in a relationship, may tend to confront each other instead of confronting the problem. For this reason, in a problem that arises in a relationship, it is necessary to try to be a solution-oriented couple who confronts the problem.
Continuing to dream of the future for the couples before and after the marriage will keep the relationship strong. Trying to turn these dreams into goals as a couple can be one of the ways to provide the energy that the relationship should have.
One of the most common mistakes in relationships is when a man or woman compares their partner with another man or woman. Often, women tend to compare their relationships with someone else’s. These comparisons can cause many negative feelings such as worthlessness and inadequacy in individuals. Of course, these negative feelings will leave their place to negative, undesirable behaviors in the relationship. All these can create obstacles in front of your relationship to continue happily. Therefore, you should be careful not to compare your relationship with someone else’s relationship.
Another common situation in relationships is when couples read each other’s minds, perhaps even thinking they’re reading it. Couples are often only interested in what they understand from their partners, instead of fully understanding the feelings and thoughts expressed and being able to mutually agree on this issue. In other words, a one-sided understanding, a one-sided judgment… However, it is important for the individual to be able to convey what he/she understands from his/her partner, especially in negative situations. In this way, it will be learned from the hero of the event before the misunderstandings grow much. For this reason, it is important for couples to take care to avoid mind readings, instead of asking them directly and conveying their feelings.
Relationships can also be taken care of to benefit from humor. The humor you will benefit from will also help you to end the energy you spend on a negative situation in a short time.
Of course, there will be feedback from the people around you in your relationships. However, by avoiding the direct contact with your relationship, you can try to understand what the people around you want to say by just feeling it. You can learn to get what you need for yourself or your relationship, and sometimes to ignore and ignore.
Finally; Are you willing to have a happy relationship? You can question your answer to this question. If your intention as a couple is the continuity of your relationship, your willingness will take you one step ahead. It is very important that this request comes from both sides. If you want to maintain a happy relationship, it means that the relationship will continue somehow and the solution of the problems can be found somehow.