In relationships where submissiveness is active, one of the spouses is constantly trying to please the other. If she does not fulfill her wishes, she fears that her husband will be angry with her, her emotional bond with him will be damaged and she will reject him. Their spouse’s self-affirmation is spiritually nurturing for these people. The possibility of his wife’s disapproval of him is very unsettling for these people. They feel guilty when they prioritize their own wants and needs. Because the priority is always the satisfaction of the other party. Conflict for these persons; is the most dangerous possibility. Because the thought of losing the “positive point of view” and approval of the spouse at the end of the conflict is a very wearisome possibility from a mental point of view. These people always tend to give more than they receive. They attribute all the actions they take to life by sacrificing themselves as “sacrifice”. In fact, they consider their actions that defeat them and drain all their energies as “must-haves”.
They feel relieved in conscience when they go beyond their own limits and take on the responsibilities of their spouses. In this way, they continue their marital relations with the peace of having proven their good intentions and sacrifices to their spouses. They feel the need to think about their spouse more than themselves in order to define themselves as the “right spouse”. Submissive persons; While they have made pleasing people their primary goal, they ignore pleasing themselves.
Submissive people often focus on their spouses, not themselves. They feel spiritual satisfaction at the level of their spouse’s satisfaction. In order to increase the comfort of their spouses, they continue their married life in an unexpected effort. After a while, they enter the process of exhaustion both physically and mentally. According to them, nothing they do is exaggerated or even incomplete. However, these individuals continue to normalize their efforts to please their spouses despite their feelings of burnout.