This time, I have come up with an article that you will find familiar features from yourself, your mother, your friend or any of your relatives while reading.
Pretty Girl Syndrome: This syndrome, which is based on the desire to be loved and respected by the society, actually stems from adopting the “cute” character taught to us in childhood and continuing it into adulthood. “So what’s wrong with being cute?” Let’s talk about the findings of the syndrome for those who think.
– Pretty girls always want to be perfect. -some physical, some spiritual- Because they think they will be accepted only if they are perfect.
– They may swallow the injustices or hurtful behaviors done to them and remain silent.
– They say “yes” even when they want to say “no”. Because one of the rules of being “cute” is unconditional acceptance.
-Because what other people think is very important to them, they have a hard time doing things that come from within.
-They are referred to as “Stop fighting, your voice doesn’t even rise” or “Quiet, calm, very naive” by those around them.
They put their own wants and needs in the background. Because pleasing other people is their first priority.
As a result of many attitudes like these, they develop a passive and dependent personality and comment on it as “What should we do, we saw it like this, we were brought up like this”. At this point, the real question is: Can’t we be pretty for ourselves instead of everyone else? What I am trying to convey here is selfish, rude etc. not to be; being kind and sensitive – which is what it should be – at the same time being able to protect your boundaries, say no, and thus have a strong ego ego.
Of course, the most difficult change is about ourselves, but since there is no situation that cannot be overcome with patience and effort, let’s see what we can do.
-Go to the past! The basis of the behaviors you are uncomfortable with today may have been laid by the messages you received from your parents in your childhood. This awareness is important.
-Always ask yourself what you think, how you feel and what you want. Take responsibility for making your own decisions, starting with the simplest issues in line with your answers.
– Just like other people do to you, you can say “no” to them when your wants and needs are not met. It doesn’t make you a bad person, it makes you an individual who knows your limits.
-Begin now to show your own wants and needs the care you show to meet the wishes of others.
– “Put the oxygen mask on yourself first, then on the child” as your metaphor. Put yourself first so you have enough strength to take care of others.
And most importantly, don’t be afraid of not being loved by other people. Remember that if a person doesn’t like you, it’s not about you, it’s about that person.