How to Gain Self-Confidence?

Self-confidence basically expresses a person’s point of view of himself and how he sees himself.

People who have positive feelings, thoughts and evaluations about themselves have a high self-confidence; On the contrary, it can be said that people with negative evaluations have lower self-confidence.

Whether a person’s self-evaluation is positive or negative affects many areas in his life. Self-confidence lies behind relationships with other people, expectations of oneself, reactions to mistakes or weaknesses, and attitudes and behaviors towards many other situations.

People with high self-esteem are comfortable accepting themselves as they are; they are more tolerant of faults or weaknesses; they are more successful in valuing and appreciating themselves; They are open to new ideas and self-development.

People with low self-confidence may see themselves as weak, inadequate or deficient; their thoughts about themselves are critical and cruel; they can never be sure of themselves; take fewer risks in social, professional or academic fields; They avoid being the center of attention or the target of criticism.

Although it is known that self-confidence develops mostly in childhood, there may be experiences that will improve or decrease self-confidence in the later stages of life.

When low self-confidence is considered, it is possible to say that the inner voice of the person who is overly critical and judgmental towards himself takes place in the background. In other words, the most basic factor that causes low self-esteem to continue, no matter how it developed in childhood, is the person’s continuing to criticize himself ruthlessly.

So to develop self-confidence, it is fundamentally important to become aware of the negative inner voice and what we are saying to ourselves. Being aware of self-critical thoughts is not easy. Especially if there is a lack of self-confidence for a long time; Self-criticism may have become a habit, a routine in one’s thoughts about himself. Self-criticism directly affects emotions. Therefore, especially when we feel guilty, sad, angry or angry, following these emotions will guide us in catching our self-critical thoughts.

The next step is to note them as you notice them. The next step is to question those thoughts, evaluate their relevance to reality, and turn them into a situational one with alternative thoughts.

This whole process requires a lot of effort and can be challenging for the person. Therefore, a therapy process that progresses with the Cognitive Behavioral Therapy method will be very beneficial for the person.

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