Imagine you are out for a walk with someone who is visually impaired. Do you determine your step distance and walking speed according to it or do you stay at your own pace!
There may be visible and invisible obstacles in human life. Ultraviolet light/rays are not absent because we cannot see them. Obstacles do not cover us as such, they are local. It affects us all, but we are not just that.
The essence of this article is to touch on the points related to the system around that person, how people approach and accompany this situation, rather than people who experience a pathological, depressed, dysfunctional period.
As can be seen in the examples given above, Psychiatric/Psychological based problems are not visible experiences like our physical disabilities. The recipe is not as simple as telling the doctor about the symptoms we experience in the common cold. It is also characterized by experiences that decrease functionality, such as sleep, loss of appetite, and decreased sexual desire, of experiences conveyed in emotional states such as constriction, squeezing, restlessness, addiction, exhaustion, aggression, and reluctance.
What kind of city is X?
What kind of cars does the X brand produce?
X group has a new album out, how are their new songs compared to their old album?
Where is food X specific to? What is the best recipe?
Influenced by the cultural context, we usually give answers to such questions based on our subjective experiences, rather than giving technical comprehensive answers.
In a different word. If the other person talks to you about the feeling of loneliness, we usually give advice by imagining your own loneliness, not the situation-emotion he/she experiences. We usually listen to the negative experiences that a friend tells about leaving his job, about his divorce life or about the traffic accident he had, according to our projection. We recommend coping skills that work on us. (In general, people listen not to understand, but to respond according to what they have experienced.)
While this protective attitude is very useful in daily life for being listened to, cared for, and establishing an outward relationship, in some cases it can turn into a desire to push the car that does not work.
If the technical problem in the vehicle does not improve due to pushing, repeating the same things over and over will become challenging for both parties. In the long run, it will bring with it patterns such as disappointment-sadness-anger. It can also make you feel powerless when you have to push the car on a slope.
We can think of human life as a set of seasons, just like in nature. Some winters are long. It goes hard. Access to resources becomes more difficult. The winter you experienced and your relative may not be experiencing the same winter. While the air conditioner is a sufficient measure for protection for you, your relative may feel the need to store his 3-month-old food in a pantry.
Needs and expectations are not as they seem, but as we see them.
Without ignoring the constructive and destructive effects of relationships, following what is happening from the right distance, on a sincere trust ground, and providing the companionship that the person needs will open communication. Contrary to what is predicted, protective reflexes can also turn into a sense of intervention in an adult life.
We should be able to observe the situation we are in from the audience seat. We don’t always manage to get into the audience seat on our own, and an expert will be instrumental at this point.
Periods of silence teach us to speak. Hunger makes it worthwhile. We named the day because it was night. Long-term unhappiness and uncertainty; It can make the period we live in as destructive and frightening as earthquakes.
However, the damage to the building as a result of the earthquake can be restored and made stronger than before. Is the building destroyed? If the excavation is recovered, the ground will be opened for a new building and living space. Nature creates itself in a chaos-based dynamic. Disasters, however challenging for the period and geography, do not bring the end of nature. On the contrary, new ecosystems, areas expand.
Just like in nature, we live in an unpredictable time. Experiential chaos states can also serve to regenerate rather than destroy us with appropriate adaptation.
Finally, I leave a movie suggestion about the environmental impact’s determination of the experienced situations and its impact.
Lars And The Real Girl, 2007