Excessive pressure for success in children

We were all very saddened by the fact that Mertcan was beaten to death by her own father for not doing her homework in the past days, and Ceren was killed by her student as a result of keeping a record for cheating. How can anxiety about school success increase so much that it results in one’s death? In what kind of pressure environment do we raise our children, consciously or unconsciously?

Success is important to every individual. As parents, we always want our children to be the most successful, get the best score, and go to the best school. For this, many material and moral sacrifices are given and these sacrifices are constantly reminded to the child. In this authoritarian parental attitude, the child’s mental health deteriorates and his motivation decreases. Some parents have expectations of their children beyond their age and capacity. This situation creates the perception of “I am valuable only if I am successful” in the child. In the event that the desired success is not achieved, the child’s self-perception becomes worthless and his self-confidence decreases.

If the parents punish their child frequently, the fear of making a mistake increases in the child, he may show aggressive attitudes and show hostility towards the parents. Children who are brought up with this attitude behave their lives as they should be, not as they want them to, and they grow up as individuals who give more importance to the feelings and thoughts of others about them than they should.

While raising our children, do not put too much pressure on them, motivate them often, do not compare them with their siblings, students or other students, do not use offensive words, be in contact with the school, provide a comfortable and peaceful environment for them to work, show love and respect.

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