One of the most important life events in the family, affecting family dynamics, is the pregnancy process. Pregnancy; A significant change is sometimes a stressor and a process that affects couples and individuals. In addition to the physiological changes experienced by the woman during pregnancy, the spouses also feel the need to adapt to the changing order psychologically and socially. Couples have to take on new roles to prepare for the new family member’s participation, and this can be described as a period of developmental crisis within the family system.
With marriage, individuals begin to form their own family orders. The adoption of husband-wife roles, the establishment of harmony, the formation of communication patterns and the addition of a new member to the family system can affect the quality of communication.
Disruption of the usual routine, increase in domestic responsibilities, sometimes trying too hard to be the “perfect parent” that society offers us; The decrease in communication between couples and the fact that spouses spend less time with each other can cause communication problems.
Major Elements in Couples Problems
-Mother’s bodily changes, weight gain and ‘Does my wife find me attractive as before?’, ‘Can I lose my weight?’ ‘Will I be able to provide adequate care and support?’ ‘Will I be able to raise my child healthy?’ encounter such concerns.
-The increase in the financial responsibilities of the father, the effort to adopt the father’s role, the change in the interest and attitude of the spouse and family members.
Postpartum sexuality is also one of the main problems. After the puerperium, it is observed that many women experience sexual reluctance. Disruption of sleep routine, fatigue, relationship-oriented life being replaced by a child-oriented life are important factors affecting sexuality.
-Increased mutual expectations; both spouses may feel the need for more support in the process of establishing harmony. The fact that spouses cannot support each other in this process and have to solve the problem on their own has a significant impact on the occurrence and increase of communication problems. In addition, such factors can cause postpartum depression in the mother.
Recommendations for Reconstruction of Couple Relationships After Pregnancy
-It will be an important factor to be able to see that the newly adopted roles and dynamics are elements that can reinforce love and the new member who joins the family is a part of your love, to spend more time together and not to leave the other parent out of the bond established with the child.
Adopting an open communication with the expression of mutual needs is an approach that can prevent the emergence of problems. Expressing what you need rather than waiting for your partner to guess will not cause problems to pile up and damage the bond.
Be willing to talk more about feelings and thoughts. The best way for couples to understand each other is to be able to talk about their feelings and thoughts.
It is supported by research that the father’s active role in the care of the baby reduces the mother’s stress level.
-Planning one-to-one activities separate from the baby. Of course, it will be difficult to spend time apart from the baby at first, but taking a break with your spouse by entrusting your baby to the family elders you can trust will help you remember the old dynamics and keep the lover-spouse relationship in balance as well as the role of parent.