There is no kind of relationship in which comparison does not harm. One of the most common mistakes families make in the child’s physical and emotional development is to compare them with the environment. We make this mistake in many areas such as weight, height, supplementary food process, toilet training, speaking skills, which start from the moment the child is born. One of the most common situations we encounter in the sessions is when parents apply with anxiety due to negative environmental comments. This process is very tiring for both parents and children. It should not be overlooked that children’s developmental rates may be different, and you should not compare your child with people who are not experts in the field. The easiest way to prevent this would be to have prior knowledge of the child’s developmental stages. For example, in toilet training, it is recommended that the training be completed between 18 and 30 months. However, while some children complete the education in 1 week, some children can complete the education in 1 month. Even if you complete daytime toilet training, nighttime training can take weeks or even months.
Comparison, which is more common in physical development stages in the first 5 years of age, leaves its place to academic and emotional comparisons over time. Just as each child’s pace of development is different, the pace of learning is also different. While some children can learn with 1 hour of study, some children may need 5 hours. The important thing is to create a working order in which your child will be happy and productive according to his interests.
I would like to address this issue in another dimension. Comparison hurts the child. A child’s best medicine is to be accepted by his parents as he is. The social relations of the child that you do not accept will progress in the same way. So, could your unaccepted childhood be the reason why you don’t accept the child as it is? There is no comparison in the nature of a healthy relationship. If you do not want to see individuals whose self-confidence is damaged, who use psychological violence in their adulthood or who deserve psychological violence against themselves, I recommend that you turn away from this mistake immediately. While reading this article, you may have faced your own childhood. The greatest favor you will do for yourself and your generation will be spiritual healing. Do not give up on changing, changing, seeking the truth. Human is a social entity; Built on learning and change. Focus on your own personal development instead of keeping up with the changing digital world and fashion every day. Most importantly, do not give up learning for a better future for children. Stay healthy..