Most of the children who come to Play Therapy; lost in time among the problems, but they are real children. The reason why these children are defined as problematic is that they exhibit aggressive, fighting, disturbing and noisy behaviors. Because they constantly create new problems not only for themselves but also for those who are in close relationship with them (parents, teachers, caregivers). These children, who are seen as problematic, are in fact unhappy and helpless children who have not been shown the feelings of love, respect, security and happiness that every child deserves. In fact, they are the most vulnerable and in the most difficult situation. They have problems, but they don’t know how to solve them. They try to release their tension with their aggressive and belligerent behavior, but these behaviors cause more problems.
I cannot help but share with you my views that I think are effective in children’s behavior in this way. Many of us become parents-to-be before we parents have been able to maintain our marriage in an orderly manner. Are we ready to have children yet? We don’t know the answer to this question. For this reason, most of us have children before we are ready for this responsibility. We put our children at the center of our lives. We find it difficult to accept our children as individuals. While we are raising children, we use traditional methods as well as methods suitable for the changing era. In the meantime, we may unintentionally set wrong examples for our children with our behaviors that we think are doing our children a favor. It is known that these situations are caused by factors such as education level, socioeconomic structure, cultural structure, and living standards. From this point of view, seeing only our children as a problem may mislead us. After we have our share as parents, we can return to play therapy.
In recent years, play therapy is an effective method to understand and help children who have adjustment problems in general. It has a very wide range. It has a wide area ranging from behavioral problems to adaptation problems, extremely aggressive, never inhibited or extremely suppressed, withdrawn and inhibited children. I am here for you, I understand your feelings, I hear you, you can trust me. Here you should know that you are accepted unconditionally as you are…. Therefore, play therapy refers to a process. There are a number of principles that the therapist must follow. These must be followed during therapy. It is important for the feeling of trust that the relationship between the therapist and the child does not go out of the therapy room. Using precise statements to parents such as “we will solve your child’s behavior problems, we will take care of all adjustment problems” will cause us to be misunderstood. We play therapists help children reflect on their feelings by providing the support they need.
There doesn’t need to be a serious incompatibility issue to give our children the support they need. In any case, children do not see themselves as a source of problems. Children in this situation feel lonely. Their situation constantly deteriorates because of their undesirable behavior. In order to get out of this vicious circle, they have the opportunity to express their feelings through play therapy. When the child feels that he is loved, safe and successful, he clings to life with all his hands. He manages to stand strong in the face of life’s ups and downs. When a child is unhappy, it is evident in their eyes. Children react with all their sensitivity to any help offered to them. Even children with very maladaptive behaviors in play therapy respond quickly. With this method, children have the opportunity to reflect their feelings and understand themselves.