Anger is the state of emotion that an individual shows against situations that he is dissatisfied with and is uneasy when faced. We can get angry at most stages of daily life. Authoritarian attitudes of parents, gossip at work, self-righteous scumbags in traffic, unsympathetic and ambitious friends often cause us to feel anger. In these situations, it is one of the basic assumptions of a healthy human profile that we get angry and angry at a certain level. However, if our anger rises far above normal, it breaks our environment and our social relations tend to deteriorate, this is not a healthy situation.
Apart from this, there are individuals who remain unresponsive and calm about anger and irritability. These individuals do not show anger reactions in the face of events and situations that occur around them and are not satisfied. They say, so to speak, that I always throw it in with their words. In this case, it is not healthy. The constant storage of stress and anger in the body and the lack of discharge of the individual may cause more severe outbursts of anger over time.
In today’s world, people are more exposed to stressful life events, due to factors such as economic and family problems, social problems, tension, uneasiness and anger in individuals. The situations expressed are in parallel with the examples expressed by mental health professionals serving within the scope of Van psychologist. Anger caused by more than one factor; If it is recognized and not denied by the person, it turns into productive over time and enables the individual to better recognize his/her mental state as well as regulating his/her social relations.
Ways to Cope with Anger
The main purpose of anger control is to prevent this feeling of the individual from turning into aggressive behaviors, to prevent him from harming himself and his environment, and to establish a healthy relationship with those around him. What is meant by anger control is not to completely eliminate the individual’s sense of anger. Anger is a natural emotion that exists in all of us and it is an emotion that must be experienced. The important thing is to put it on the axis of normality.
In order to control anger, the individual needs to do some things physically and mentally. Taking a deep breath from the diaphragm in the moment of anger will relax the individual. However, it is also important for the individual to suggest himself with commands such as calm down and relax. In addition, changing places, going for a walk or sitting down and calming down if on the go are among the things that can be done physically to control anger.
The individual should be well acquainted with anger and the situations that cause anger. An individual who recognizes his emotions and is at a good point in awareness will express his emotions and feelings in a healthy way. He will see what thoughts and situations the anger arises from and will be able to identify the source of anger and control his anger.
Most people storm their inner world during anger. He hurls curses at the person or object on the opposite side. He cannot think clearly and dramatizes events by evaluating events exaggeratedly. Besides, he now evaluates everything in a pessimistic way. The individual should get rid of this mindset and understand that these thoughts will not help improve the current situation. “Being angry will cause me to wear myself out even more. In this way, he should make suggestions to himself in the form of “I will make the event even bigger.” In the moment of anger, logic and reasoning will be disabled. The individual should try to use his logic as much as possible. At the same time, try to clear your mind of sentences that start with negative words such as “never”, “never”, “no longer possible”. Reassure yourself that life goes on and that this situation and event is not the end of your life for you.
If the individual does not express the situation that causes uneasiness in him, he will be wrong when he is right, and perhaps it will cause irreversible situations and regret will not help. In the moment of anger, action should not be taken immediately and the first thing that comes to mind should not be expressed. Instead, he should first pause and be given the opportunity to express himself on the other side. At the same time, by asking questions to the other individual, it is necessary to reach an agreement on the ground of conversation with the individual by preserving the tone of voice as much as possible. In times of anger, alternative responses can be developed and worked on.
The fact that individuals are not sometimes in environments that make each other intolerant will prevent the occurrence of anger. For example, if your friend loses himself in discussion environments and enters into disrespectful situations, you can move away from the environment to avoid being present and angry.
Being at an exhausting and over-capacity pace, economic difficulties, family problems make us tense and ready to get angry at any moment. Being aware of this, various sports activities can be done and nature walks can be made. Thus, the discharge of our body will have a positive effect on us spiritually.
Another reason underlying the emergence of violent tendencies in moments of anger and the harsh discourse of individuals against each other is that individuals approach each other with a prejudiced and accusatory discourse. This language will only increase the tension and will not contribute to the solution. Instead, explaining your uneasiness and upsetting situations with the language of “I” will not only reduce the tension, but will also soften the other side and open the door for them to understand you.
In situations where tension is at its peak, humor in a way that does not offend the other party and does not make fun of it will allow the tense air to soften.