In this article, questions such as what is borderline personality disorder, which is beginning to increase in the society, who is most common and how to treat it, will be answered in this article, as well as how to establish social relations with individuals with borderline personality disorder.
The prevalence of borderline personality disorder in the community is known to be 2-3%. Borderline means “borderline”, so it can also be called borderline personality disorder. The individual shows unbalanced emotions and behaviors towards the people around him. Borderline personality disorder or borderline personality disorder is more common in women, especially they often feel like they are in a vacuum and are trying to fill this gap. The gap here is tried to be filled, especially through relationships, so people start to react much more than normal in cases of abandonment, dislike or exclusion. These reactions are often given in anger and in the direction of self-harm. People with borderline personality disorder experience almost all of their emotions on the fringes. Like anger, the feelings of love are located at the two extremes that go to the extreme. Both emotions and behaviors of a person often vary. For example, while an individual’s close friend may be the best person in the world for him, he may think that he is the worst person in the world for his friend when he thinks that he is hurt or unloved.
Borderline Personality Disorder Diagnostic Criteria
1) Identity confusion
2) Inconsistent and tense interpersonal relationships between extremes of magnification and disgrace
3) At least two self-harming impulsivity (spending money, sex, substance abuse, unsafe driving, etc.)
4) Making frantic efforts to avoid abandonment
5) Inappropriate intense anger, difficulty in anger management
6) Inconsistency in affect
7) A persistent sense of emptiness
8) Repetitive suicidal behaviors, attempts, or intimidation
9) Temporary suspicious thoughts or severe dissociative symptoms related to the strain.
excessive alcohol use
Physically self-harming (striking, doing dangerous activities)
Having sexual intercourse with more than one or many different people in a short period of time
Frequent haircuts, color changes, etc.
The person harms himself by bringing the dangerous situations listed above into his life with his impulsive behaviors. Thus, he tries to feel good about himself or to cope with the bad feelings he has experienced.
Causes of Borderline Personality Disorder:
As a result of the researches, it has been seen that sexual or emotional abuse in childhood is among the causes of borderline personality disorder. According to studies, divorced parents and not receiving enough attention from their parents significantly pave the way for borderline personality disorder. BPD is particularly relevant to the developmental stages in which the individual begins to structure his or her personality. It is known that the 0-2 age period occurs between the 16th and 24th months when the baby is left with feelings that he cannot cope with in the process of separation and individualization from the mother. For example, inconsistent mother’s (caregiver) behavior, resentment or guilt, and feelings of neglect or occupation that the baby cannot cope with. Caring for the child by someone other than the mother or being cared for by more than one person are also among the other reasons that pave the way for borderline personality disorder. Because of all these reasons, an unintegrated self-perception begins to form in the baby. Blacks and whites cannot be combined, and the world begins to live in extremes such as good and bad. The perception of a world with blacks and whites (to love too much, to hate too much, to eat too much, to eat too little, etc.) is a major obstacle to a person’s mental and physical health. Therefore, there is always a need for grays…
Individuals with borderline personality disorder often experience fear of loss. Since they have a tendency to blame themselves for any situation they experience, they act to blame others in order to suppress this feeling, but in essence they often feel guilty. Especially with the sadness caused by the feeling of worthlessness, they make altruistic behaviors in order to be valued. The need to be loved the most has an important place in determining the behavior of borderline people. For example, they continue their perfectionist behavior when they think they are loved when they are perfect. One of the most common feelings of borderline personality disorder is addiction. Addiction is mostly against the people they care about in their lives. Therefore, to be abandoned means to disappear for a borderline person.
Treatment of Borderline Personality Disorder:
The majority of clients who come to psychotherapy are individuals with borderline personality disorder. They come to psychotherapy mostly with relationship problems. Most of the clients who come with relationship problems feel depressed and angry. For example, the person who has just separated from his partner may show intense anger that he wants to kill his partner in therapy. Individuals with borderline personality disorder have many behavioral patterns that can disrupt their relationships and their own mental health. For example, being offended, attacking (physically or verbally), self-pitying (crying, not eating, sleeping for long hours), sexuality, alcohol, suicide, impulsive behaviors, testing love and abandonment (sometimes clients can see how much they are loved and test it. The person he is in contact with is trying to test this by leaving or getting offended in order to be able to do it), self-destructive behaviors, etc.
In psychotherapy, all behaviors and emotions of the client are handled. The therapist tries to customize their feelings by helping the client cope with bad feelings. Childhood traumas are handled in therapy and it is tried to optimize the bad effects on the person. Individuals with borderline disorder may have to deal with many problems in daily life. The therapist helps the client to get more satisfaction from daily life by aiming to increase their ability to cope with stress. Some feelings can only be felt but cannot be put into words. By understanding and labeling the client’s feelings, the therapist helps the client to better understand himself, touch his feelings and get to know himself better. The human brain can relearn through emotion. A healthy relationship that the client establishes with the therapist largely treats the client. As therapy progresses, the blacks and whites in the client’s life begin to decline. The client, who starts to experience grays, starts to get more pleasure and satisfaction from life like other healthy individuals. With therapy, she begins to understand her feelings and understand how she can calm them by reducing the behaviors that harm her.